Bringing home a newborn

I’d like to start by talking about that car journey home. You know the one I mean, that very first time you’re in a moving vehicle with that tiny little newborn and all of a sudden being in the car is a super dangerous place. I sat in the back of the car with Hope on that journey and I can tell you know my eyes never left her, I was in pain and could barely stay awake, but there was no way I wasn’t going to keep an eye on her. 

That first ever drive from the hospital felt like it went on forever. A drive that usually takes around 20 minutes felt like it was hours long. Hope looked lost in her car seat, I was so paranoid that she would be cold I wrapped her in so many layers, a vest, sleep-suit, woolly hat, mittens and a thick woolly coat, all in which was big on her so you could only just see her face in the car seat. She slept the whole way home and with all the layers I couldn’t see her chest moving to tell if she was breathing so I just held my hand on her chest, just to be safe.

We arrived home at midnight, I was the most tired I had ever been in my whole entire life, oh and hungry! Lewis had snuggles with Hope as he wasn’t aloud to be with her in the hospital, while I sat and ate some toast! By the time I headed to bed it was around half 1/2 in the morning. I could have slept for a week but by 5am I was up and ready to see my baby girl again. It’s weird How your body literally just runs on empty. 

I still haven’t slept much since that first night, I hear every move she makes in the night, from turning her head to lifting her arm I hear it. I wake every hour (automatically) and check she’s breathing. I don’t even do it on purpose my body just does it without my control. 

Just take it all in, you’ll feel like a nervous wreck that first time you bring them home but it does get easier! I’d like to say that you manage to get some sleep too but I’d be lying sorry, lucky for us Hope has slept straight through the night since she was around 7 weeks old but I still struggle with my own sleep. Oh and when people tell you to nap when they do don’t always take notice, Hope has quick 10-20 minute power naps in the day and I like to have a cup of tea or flick through my phone as that’s time I get just to myself, spend that time how you want to not how anyone else tell you to!